summer is incomplete without vnecks. crisp, solid white vnecks. man. it just makes everything better. i encourage you to all get out there, get some sun, and where a white vneck. heck yeah. anyways, today was good and bad. lets talk about it. i woke up pretty late, talked to my best friend, got ready and met up with an important woman in my life and read some books with her, had lunch, got asked to apply at a resteraunt (crazy, i know) went shoe shopping, and then i got called into work. freaking dang. i hate being managment sometimes because its MY store and anytime they need something i have to come through. haha. oh well, i love my job and my store and i am willing to suffer some to be succesful. i gotta super bad headache while we were shopping and it made me so mad. so so mad. i just got SO angry at the fact that i had to feel sick. im so tired of it. my body aches, my head pounds, my eyes hurt, my back hurts, my cramps hurt. jesus i need some mercy. anyways that was my day. i was really tired at work, needless to say.

ok, on to more important heart matters. it sucks being sick. it makes me feel like i should just give up and get some rest and let myself feel sick. i want to call out of work, sit down a lot, cry to my sister anna, and eat unhealthy foods. haha. but, i know that will never work so i decide not to do that because if i just give up now then i will never be able to make it up out of the depths. these depths. the hollow dark hallways that i wallow in. i will sit in them. eyes closed, head down. for hours. just thinking of the darkness that lies deep within me. the lies and thievery my heart gets away with everyday. 

Yeshua Hamaschiach, i need you. i need Your Gentle Spirit to guide me. lead me to quiet waters, where light abides inside me. Your Love with be my banner, and i will praise You. all day and night, i will praise You. i get so tired.

i miss jill a lot. its like a small part of my crazy heart is somewhere else. come home.

i will be in intercession this week for my friends. may the Lord bless you and keep you. 

baruch bashem!